Do they have medicine for STRESS?

So the past couple days I have been on stress overload. I think it has made me sick, because since Friday I have felt like crap.
I am stressed about so many things.. mostly August's birthday party. It would be so much easier if our house wasn't small, or we had a backyard. Lisa offered her house, and I have also thought of parks...yet I feel like every time I have made a choice, it's the wrong one.. so really I haven't made up my mind yet! His party is in 27 days.. ahhh.
I am stressed about our house situation and money. The stress is always there, but lately it's been on overload maximum (haha).
I don't know what to do about this stress. I need a getaway, that's paid for!
What I need is a party planner for free, so I don't have to worry about all this. Can you tell I've never really planned a party...like a real one. The guest list is like crazy. It's like 100 people. 1/2 family and 1/2 friends, and I have tried to slim it down but I can't.. I know not everyone will come, I can already remove like 30 people...
Ok well I need some food and to just get my mind clear!!!!!!!

so sick of being fat.

So I used to think I was fat like 7 years ago, but 7 years ago I was only 140 pounds! Then I slowly gained weight.. and 7 years later, after having a baby I am now 185.5 pounds. I really hate looking at my flabby stomach, my big round face, my huge thighs.. so a few weeks ago I decided that I am really going to make a change.. and stick to it.
I want to be 140 again and feel skinny. I would actually like to be smaller than that, but I'll shoot for 140!
So I got this lose it app, which has helped so much. I have been trying to work out every day. Lately I have been doing Wii Fit for at least 30 minutes, and if I can get a walk in also then it's even better. Yesterday I walked with Lori for 80 minutes, and I felt great. I love walking, and I actually love getting off my butt and working out! I look forward to it, unlike before.
Also, I have been cutting my portions of food down. I still eat the same things, except all the fries whenever I'd go out, but I just don't eat as much. I look at how many calories are in everything. I can eat alittle over 1700 calories, and usually I am right on target everyday. I will go over maybe once a week, but not by much.
When I started I was 188 pounds. I think I have been doing it for about 3 weeks and I am now 185.5, which isn't bad.. since I gained a few pounds over superbowl weekend! If it wasn't for that, I would probably be alittle lighter!
Anyway.. I am just really glad that I found something I can stick too and doesn't totally change what I can and can't eat.
My goal is to be 170 pounds by June, which is a weight loss of 1 pound a week. I really think I can do it.
That's all. I am going to be a skinny bitch.. so watch out!

Walking.

Last night I decided that since I knew it was going to be nice out that I would walk to the grocery store to pick up my BC pills instead of driving! So this morning after August woke up and had his breakfast and I had my breakfast we went upstairs and I tired putting him down for a nap...not happening! So I put him on the bed with his paci, remote and pillows and turned on the boob tube to Yo Gabba Gabba.. he LOVES that show.
I took a really quick shower, got ready, got August stuff ready and then got him ready. We set out for our walk at 11:03. It started to get really hot! I put my small little cardigan over the stroller to shield the sun from August's face. He ended up falling asleep. We got to Matt's work 30 minutes later and then I went over to the grocery store to pick up my BC, some bandaids for my feet, some fish crackers for Augie, some new paci's and sippy cups. Then August and I went to TNT's and got a child's chocolate/vanilla yogurt. It was really good, and August ate more than half of it! Then Matt called and we decided to go to HANG OUT THAI CAFE.. it's really good and really cheap! We ate there and then hung out in the back of his truck. I really didn't want to walk back home because my feet were hurting so bad, but I did of course. So I got August a bottle and we headed back.. Took me about 25 minutes to get back home, took off my shoes when we got close to the house because my feet hurt so bad.
I feel so refreshed, and I think August really enjoyed it. He likes being outside and the past week with all that rain we didn't go outside!
Anyway.. that's my long story of my short walk!
I need to change a diaper...oh motherhood.

Blog it.

So I haven't blogged in awhile, I guess I don't have time...?
Well I don't even know what I blogged about last.
All I know is Friday we have an appointment that is going to change our life for the better.
We have alot going on right now and things are going to get better. I feel like the last few months so many doors have slammed in our face, and finally slowly new doors are opening, showing a light at the end of this dark tunnel we have been in.

August -
He has almost 8 teeth, and it's crazy. He isn't crawling or walking, but I think he will soon. He has been really cranky today and it's given me a headache.

I can't believe in 2 months he will be 1! We are doing a robot themed party, I am excited!
ok

So sick..

So my work is stressing me out so much that it is making me sick. The past few weeks I have been so unhappy. I used to love my job, love the people I work with, and I didn't really think it was work because I had so much fun doing what I do. But lately it is the complete opposite. I can not stand half the people I work with, no one does their job, they promise homeowners things and then don't fulfill their promises! They are ALWAYS late and call me to call the homeowner to let the homeowner know they aren't going to be there at 8:30..(well no shit, it's already 9!) They really don't respect people, they are really two faced a lot of the times. My boss was mad at my mom and hasn't spoke to her since.. and it's been about 2 months! She doesn't even know what she is suppose to be doing, no one does!
I really miss the way work used to be, but now I am only thinking about me, my health, and my family.. and I don't feel like working here is helping with my stress, my health, and spending actual quality time with my son!
I feel so miserable and it really sucks.

Stress, Emotions...

Lately I have felt like my heart is so heavy...my chest is in pain and I am so stressed out. I know why I am stressed, but right now there is nothing that I can do.

We aren't going to sale our house, we are going to try and work things out, but if it comes down to it, we might just have to.

I am really looking forward to the new year, I think it is going to bring great changes to Matt and I. I am really excited for new adventures that may come our way.

Happy Holidays.

Falling Behind...Catching Up...

We fell behind, we won't catch up.
We have decided to "Short Sale" our house.
It will be for the best in the long run. We want to move to Arroyo Grande or Nipomo, in a house with a backyard and 3 bedrooms.
This is going to be a long and stressful process, but we are ready.